A Request. No, A Desperate Plea.

IF you have as much black hair covering your body as an average gorilla and,
IF that hair extends down your lower back and covers your butt and even extends into your nasty fluffy butt crack and,
IF you insist on wearing low rise jeans with no visible undergarment and sit outside, leaning way forward in your chair talking to your friends while innocent people, even children, are walking by, or God forbid, trying to enjoy a cold Starbucks beverage on a freakishly hot southern California day,
THEN for God's sake put on an overcoat or jacket or at least a long shirt to cover that thing up. Better yet, just wear a jumpsuit.